Why do we put ourselves through this crazy ritual we call dating? Over and over again we build up our hopes thinking this person may just be “The One.”
Who is “The One?”
What Does “The One” look like?
What Separates “The One” from all the rest?
I questioned several people and found that “The One” is very different for each person. No one can tell you about “The One” for you. They will not always see what you see or understand the connection. And, it is all about connecting. You’ll be thinking, “this person really gets me.”
“The One” doesn’t have to be the most handsome, the smartest, the richest, the smoothest, the strongest, etc..
‘The One’ is the only person who you connect with on a deeper level. The person who makes your heart feel light and happy just to talk to. The person who actually finds joy in making you happy. When you are with ‘The One’, there is no time of day (including the middle of the night) that is off-limits for a conversation.
‘The One’ will always make you feel like you are the most beautiful, the smartest, the sexiest, the funniest, and simply the best person.
‘The One’ connects with you like no other. ‘The One’ is the only one who really understands what a gift you are to this world. And in the recesses of your heart you finally feel truly loved and valued.
A friend of mine recently married off her second child. She told me how she always knew when ‘The One’ showed up for her children. It was a totally different relationship that she observed. Each person became their best self when they were with ‘The One.’
I believe this is why we continue to engage in this crazy ritual we call dating. We’re just searching for ‘The One.’
When did you know ‘The One’ had finally arrived?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
The rules and experience of dating certainly have changed over the last few decades. Male or female, everything is more confusing now, and many people are broken by the process. I have met many such people, male and female, with all their baggage next to mine.
The only truly honest relationships (in the “later” days) would have to start with an honest inventory of everyone’s baggage-the same disclosed by the other. The sincerity and scope of this kind of disclosure would immediately speak volumes by design. People can manipulate each other there as well, but the context at that point is entirely new.
Some of the mystery will be gone, but you will get a much better result…at least these days. Only twice did I meet another possessing such candor, and in each case I absolutely trusted them and they trusted me and we never did let each other down.
The first relationship fizzled but we were too honest at that point to generate any unnecessary drama. No miserable breakup. The second candid relationship was a marriage, and she is, luckily, my wife.
My point is that (I think) everyone has already figured out that mystery in a relationship can go either way. We have to decide which way-along the spectrum-we want to go and without pointing fingers. If we can do all that, relationships would be easy but who wants that?
I really appreciate your candor with me and my readers. It’s so nice to hear a male perspective, especially when that male has depth. The world today is very different. And, I agree, total honesty is the only way to have a relationship. Let’s just place all the cards on the table. No need to point fingers…we have different needs, wants and perspectives. Not wrong or right…just different. So happy you found “the one” for you. We do make things “harder than they have to be” in many aspects of life (golf being my current issue). Namaste and thanks for sharing.