Married Men Plentiful Bounty

I did my research.  Consensus is….if you know from the start that it is only temporary, and you are not falling in love…you have needs that must be met.  Go for it.  After all, this is a quality person, right?  He is smart, classy, always sexy, takes you to fine restaurants, makes you feel like the most beautiful and important woman on the planet.

You lead yourself to believe that all the wonderful times you are having with him are far better than being with another “average” guy or certainly better than being “alone.”  Funny thing about “alone,” which is what you will end up being all those nights when he living in his “other life.”

And, his wife doesn’t appreciate or value him the way you do.  He didn’t tell you.  You just know it (of course he doesn’t want to bring her up…that would mean she actually exists).

There are so many reality checks along the way…holidays, special occasions that you will not share, not going to the theatre together.  Friends tell you…you are dumb, all you are to him is a free $#*!  He is not yours!

If you are single and he is married, you are not on the same playing field.  You are in a totally different league.  He is living “a life and a half” and you are living “half of a life.”   They almost never leave  their current lives.

A wise man explained the phenomenon to me.  A man’s wife has been nagging him and he is finding such relief with his girlfriend.  He is so happy to be with her.  No pressure here.  Life is great.  He may begin to think how great it would be if he were to marry her and divorce his wife.  Until…one day the girlfriend starts having visions of marriage and starts wanting answers about their future together and she starts to pressure him.  All of a sudden the wife starts looking really good again.

Just remember that relationships should add value to your life.

Try to choose a person who can be with you to share all of what life has to offer.   But, it is our inalienable right to pick our own poison.  Sometimes we learn from an unhealthy relationship, some people get into holding patterns.

Advice from friends…Remember it’s all about YOU!  Put your needs first. Take care of number one.  Repeat this to yourself many times.