I didn’t have any specific plans for Friday night, and I got a text from my friend, Margaret, who was meeting another friend for drinks at an Italian restaurant in town. I quickly responded “I’m there.”
I was the last to arrive. Everyone was either two glasses of wine or two espresso martinis ahead of me. I ordered my wine and was listening to Sandra talk about the fact that there was a shortage of men out there. As we glanced to our left, a very handsome man named Carl had unintentionally been eavesdropping (we were a little loud) and had a broad smile on his face. Someone started to apologize, but he smiled and told us that he was having trouble finding a woman to date. He hadn’t had a date in three months.
I was getting hungry and the bartender told us he had two available seats. We ordered our meals and were deciding where we were going to finish our evening when Tom, a gentleman four seats to our left said, “Do you dance?” (as he did the finger walk). I don’t know what that had to do with dancing, but I said “definitely!” He said there was music across the street at another restaurant.
I told him we would try it and if it wasn’t any good, we were going to Polcari’s, a ten minute drive away. He said he didn’t have a car. I asked him how he got to the restaurant. He said he walked. I said “You must live in the house across the street,” as I pointed. He said, “Pretty close.”
Margaret and I were leaving the restaurant and we spotted Carl and I asked him if he wanted to go across the street to hear the music. He thought it was a good idea. Tom was waiting to pay his bill, and leaned over to me and said, “Can I ask you a question?” I said, “Sure”. He wanted to know how I felt about passion. “Passion?” I asked, “I’m not quite understanding the question.” “Do you mean sex?” He said, “You know that feeling that you get when you are totally into it.” I said, “You mean chemistry?” He said, “I’m not good at using big words.” I said “Well, I think I’m a passionate person.” “And as far as chemistry goes, you either have it or you don’t with a person.” I was thinking it was a little early for that conversation.
Across the street we were happy to find that the entertainment was excellent…a versatile singer accompanied by prerecorded music. Great dance music. We decided to stay.
Carl arrived first and then Tom. Tom wanted to dance and I thought that was a great idea until I started dancing with him. He kept trying to pull me closer and I kept planting both my hands on his chest to keep him and his passion at a respectable distance. He kept saying, ” I really like you a lot.” (This was after 10 minutes.)
I tried to make conversation but it was not easy. I asked him if he had any brothers or sisters. He said he had brothers and sisters but he had not seen them in six years. Then I asked him if he had any children. He paused, looked at me, and said “That’s a difficult question.” (Red Flag!) I said, “We could start with a yes or no.” He said he hadn’t seen his children in six years. I was thinking that I know all I need to know. His relationship with his family does not sound healthy. I realize that everything is circumstantial. But it was starting to feel creepy. And you know how I feel about intuition. If it doesn’t feel good, it’s not good.
He kept saying “thank you so much for tonight.” I guess a little conversation and a few dances is what he needed. Unfortunately, he was a little more than what I needed.
It was getting late and I was ready to leave. He said, “I’m not going to see you again, am I?” I said, “Probably not.” To which he replied, “I didn’t think so.”
He stayed. I’m sure he found someone else to squeeze on the dance floor. Someone whose needs were similar to his.
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