Welcome to my Dating World

I was trying to think of how I might convey how I really feel about the dating scene...what I might be able to compare it to so that women would get an understanding of what it is really like out there. So, grab a cup of coffee or a martini and take a look around. I suggest you start with this post: CLICK HERE!

Let’s Talk About Monogamy

November 4, 2013

To Love, Honor & Cherish?

To Love, Honor & Cherish?

I was reading an article yesterday on Blogher written by Feminista Jones, an open, outspoken, intelligent woman writing about relevant sexual issues. I’ve enjoyed many of her blogs, find them interesting and thought- provoking.   Yesterday’s article, Are You 100% Sure Monogamy Is For You? was no different.

Feminista Jones was all about having important conversations with your significant other regarding his truest feelings on monogamy and making sure you understand them and feel the same way.  Assume nothing when you are entering into a new relationship.

Ask lots of questions beginning with how he feels about monogamy.

She spoke of monogamy as being about sexual behavior only, saying, “My emotional connection to a partner is separate” and “My heart is not in my vagina.”

I wanted to leave a comment until I got to the line “If you expect me to be monogamous, you need to f*#! me well enough to keep me focused on only you.”  I was stunned.  First, because my web developer told me not to use profanity. It turns off publishers if you’re trying to get a book deal (supposedly).  Secondly, I needed time to digest this.

I instantly felt like a dinosaur.  Is there something wrong with my thinking?  I believed myself to be an open person, but am a serial monogamist (one relationship at a time).   I wondered… if your sex life is lacking and then you introduce a third party, isn’t that just the beginning of the end of your relationship?  The last time I checked, men have  very delicate egos.  If your boyfriend thought you were having sex with another man, wouldn’t that be a little tough on his ego.  Or does the competition begin and he steps up his game? I think not!

She added, “Because my partner leaves me wanting for nothing sexually doesn’t have a damned thing to do with me proving loyalty or emotional fidelity.”  I agree with that statement.  But is that a real argument for being emotionally connected to one person while being sexually fulfilled by another.  It spells  t-r-o-u-b-l-e  to me.    (Even if you have agreed to have sexual partners outside of the relationship.)

I’ve spoken to a few men about ‘the open life’.  I could never buy into it.  One man asked me about what things I enjoyed doing and how I would describe a perfect week.  I kept it simple and said, “Oh, you know, maybe going out to dinner a few times, doing something athletic such as working out at the gym, playing a round of golf, maybe going to the movies or theatre, and just meeting an interesting person for a coffee to discuss current topics or what’s going on in the world.”  He said “I can do that.”  I was thinking “I wasn’t asking you, and don’t you already have a girlfriend?”

I really hope that the majority of women and men are still monogamous.  I pray that the ones that are not are at least honest and use protection.

Be smart…Be safe…Be upfront…Beware!!!!

And ask LOTS of questions.

What do YOU think?

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Over 50 Or Under 50 Same Dating Issues

October 31, 2013

The issues that bother women over 50 are the same issues that bother the under 50 women.  You may be financially independent, have a great career, lots of interests and friends, keep fit and are attractive, but dating is still challenging. Several women have asked me for dating advice when a relationship they were in […]

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Celebrating Berlin’s 40th Marathon

October 14, 2013

I know I was exhausted, but I was feeling kind of weird that first day in Berlin.  Coming from a vacation that seemed like Disneyland in comparison.  Provence, Cannes, Nice, Monte Carlo, Barolo, Italy and then Berlin.  The  contrast was too great. What the people of Berlin have endured in the past century is hard […]

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When Vacations Start To Feel Like Jobs

October 12, 2013

EasyJet?  A Serious Misnomer. My friend, Gene, booked us on EasyJet for our direct flight from Lyon to Berlin for the Marathon.  When he called to tell me about booking on this airline I was a little dubious.  I said, “You’re kidding, right?”  How many seats are on this plane, ten?  He said, “Five including […]

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Next Stop Italia!

September 25, 2013

We checked out of our hotel in Antibes and headed up the coast and mountains to Barolo, Italy, where we stayed for the next two days and attended the cheese festival in Bra, a few towns away.     We met Raffaela at Il Gioco dell’oca, the Inn she owns and operates at the base […]

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French Riviera: Nice, France

September 24, 2013

We left Antibes and headed up the coast to Nice.  It is such a beautiful drive looking at the ocean, but if you look to the left, the buildings look run down.  The problem is that there is a railway that runs parallel to the coastline and offers no access to the shore from that side. […]

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The French Riviera: Antibes

September 23, 2013

Yes, this is beginning to feel like a whirlwind tour.  We started the day off in Antibes at 9:00 am and finished in Monte Carlo at 5:00 pm.  It was a lot of driving and we managed to stop off at Eze also on the way to Monaco.     We decided to go to […]

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The French Riviera: First Stop Cannes

September 22, 2013

The Ambassadeur Marriott Hotel in Juan Les Pins, just outside of Antibes, was our base of operation in the French Riviera as it is centrally located between Cannes and Nice. We spent a few days traveling along the French Riviera (aka Cote d’Azur), and it is blue!  We stopped in Cannes where we walked along […]

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My Mini Tour De France: Sept 16th

September 20, 2013

  Please tell me.  How does anyone get fit enough to ride the Tour de France?  I don’t know what all the hype is about when it comes to cycling.  Your butt kills, your neck feels like the helmet weighs a ton, leaning forward so your back aches.  Hamstrings feel like they’re going to snap any […]

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Blogging Through France: Sept 15th

September 17, 2013

We began our Sunday in Carpentras where a Marche aux puces (antique/flea market) is held in a large parking lot one Sunday each month.  It was fun to stroll down the aisles searching for little gems on this mild, sunny afternoon. I personally have a difficult time sifting through lots of items to find my […]

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